WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE GENTLEMAN?!
-BY IRENE OPARA
The meaning of being a gentleman has changed over the course of time. When you are speaking historically, the title of being a gentleman was not originally based on the action of a man, rather it was a given birthright. Men with parents that were wealthy and had a good social standing would be considered to be among gentleman. During this time period these gentleman did not work to achieve the wealth and status they had, but instead the title became more or less inherited through their family name and origins.
Over time, the meaning of gentleman began to change and evolved into something quite different. The term gentleman has of course, changed over hundreds of years, however now it’s used to describe the actions and behaviors of a man.
21st century – What does it mean to be a gentleman today?
In the 21st century being a gentleman is based on a man’s values, morality and honor. It means that a man will devote his life to a superior standard of conduct. This does not mean that they feel as if they are better than anyone else; it just means that they hold themselves to a high set of standards.
Qualities of a gentleman (The code of conduct for being classy)
When you hear the word ‘gentleman’, think ‘class’ and class is not ALL ABOUT DRESSING. In today’s fast-paced modern society, being a good man can seem like a complex undertaking, but it’s actually not that difficult to accomplish
.All it takes is an unwavering resolve to abide by your internal code of honor.
Ultimately, to be an extraordinary symbol of masculinity, you must exemplify the following characteristics. These attributes will directly reflect upon a guy’s good nature.
Qualities of a gentleman include;
- Self-determination: this is the most crucial quality of a truly great man. Nothing can stop a guy who trusts his own skills. This inner assuredness translates into mental willpower, which can take him to the top of any field.
- Accountability: The ability to accept responsibility for anything is an inherent leadership trait.
- Hygiene: this cannot be over emphasized, keep in mind that no amount of mental or spiritual development can make up for poor physical presentations. Pay attention to all of the senses and not just looks.
- Be direct when it comes to your problems. Don’t just shy away and throw them under the rug. Talk about them when appropriate. Speak up when you don’t agree with what’s being said; make your voice heard. Have the balls to ask out any woman.
- Be bold, trust yourself. Challenge your fears with courage. Make every single cell of your body light up with fire and scream at you, “don’t do it”!
- Balance your life. Prioritize your time. I don’t mean just at the workplace or office, but also with your family and friends. If you are determined to reach a specific goal, step back and determine if the people in your life play a positive or negative role in achieving it. Remember, time is the most important thing a man can spend in his lifetime. Time is money!
- Listen, regardless of your opinion or thoughts on the matter. You can often learn a great deal by paying attention to someone. Even if you believe there’s nothing to learn, you’ll still gain a better understanding. Most men tend to think listening only requires you to be present, that’s just not true. It requires effort!
- Believe and do whatever it is you dream of. Take charge, be initiative. If you really wish to be the next Benjamin Carson, you must first actually believe it. A good man knows the exact type of person he wants to become in the future. He continually works towards that goal.
- Respect yourself and others. A man can still be masculine and rugged with a sense of kindness. Aside from chivalry and romance, making it a habit to do the right thing is well, a good thing. Remember the old saying, “You reap what you sow”. If you treat people like trash, there’s a good chance they’ll throw you in the trash.
- Commit to your word. A good man doesn’t just make promises, he lives up to his personal guarantees. A good reputation to a man is everything. It affects everything: Trust in your relationship, credit with your finances, and so on. If you are in a relationship, have a sense of loyalty. In essence, don’t be a sly.
- Set your goals, know the details of each. A man without goals is like a sailor out in on the seas with no map to guide. He has no direction in mind, spending his time wandering with no true purpose. If you have been wondering why certain people are so organized, rich or successful here is your answer.
A man with any ambition must set his goals higher than he believes he can achieve. An unrealistic goal may seem like fiction, yet with time and progress it will seem more and more reasonable.
- Know the value of your money. A good man knows the power of his money, he does not let his hard work go to waste. Invest for the future and avoid the instant gratification, for it is far too easy to get hooked to. Plan your finances, know how to make a budget. Remember that a fool will buy everything he wants, while a wise man will only buy things he truly needs.
- Have good manners. Their easy to learn, yet even easier to forget. Be consideration towards others, regardless of your personal opinion or view. A good man does not belittle his fellow man, nor does he judge him.
- Seek knowledge. There is no better place to be than in a constant state of learning. Expand your mind, keep it open to new concepts and ideas. Read, ask questions, and have a sense of burning curiosity.
- A man is shaped by the men he respects. Make it a point to elevate and drop toxic friends from time to time. If those around you constantly bring you down, they deserve no part in your life. Find a mentor, join a close-knit group, and meet with them regularly.
- Always be in control of yourself and your actions. A good man has a sense of temperance. He thinks before he acts without letting his emotions get the best of him. Save yourself from future embarrassment, regret and wrongdoing by using logic before lashing out.
- Make peace in private. A good man knows he does not need the attention of the public in order to get his point across. He settles arguments with professionalism and reason. He is comfortable in all situations and negotiates with an iron first.
- A vision to lead. Every man’s actions affect the lives of others in the future. A good man is aware of those around him, whether it be children or adults. He not only encourages them to process forward, but also supports them in times to despair and failure. A good man makes use of his confidence to inspire others when they feel they have none left.
- Well-spoken and speaks effectively. For most men today, communication can be a real challenge. It requires practice and patience to be able to express our thoughts and ideas clearly. A good man can convey his emotions and intentions with ease, consistently.
- A fine presentation. There’s no doubt about it, looks do matter. Regardless if we agree or not, one thing is certain: Portraying a positive self-image can do wonders for making good impressions. It means that a good man will take the time to groom himself and invest some thought in what he wears. His presentation matches his personality.