THE STATE OF OUR SPOONS
Brownites would recall that upon return to the Alexander Brown Hall and subsequent re-opening of the cafeterias, a new price list was released, one which was later deemed unfavourable for brownites. Shortly after, there was a discussion between the cafeteria management and relevant parties in the hall management, this led to a new agreement where a reduced price for the same quality and quantity was promised.
In a follow-up interview with the hall’s social and buttery minister, he addressed concerns raised about a foreseeable reduction in quantity or/and quality, assuring brownies that such would not be the case.
Alas, those concerns were not unfounded and when a Brownite said that we may very well be trading quantity for a cheaper price, she did not lie. What started as a good recourse has now become a problem.
Brownites, how many spoons, or better put, mini spoons of prestige’s rice do you now buy? How many mini-spoons would you need if you wanted to eat till maximal satisfaction? Perhaps, you should get a gun, you may need to rob that bank after all.
Wahala for people with large appetites, double wahala for those who do not cook at all.
Wait, is it possible that there are different spoons for different folks and that the mini-spoons are reserved for only a select few, the chosen ones?
Ladies, have you ever wished you were a man?
Well neither have I, not until last week when standing across the counter at the cafeteria I thought to myself “maybe if I were a guy, this food would have been more than this”. This was after what the Yorubas would call fisi or Jara (the little extra added to a person’s goods as a show of appreciation, familiarity, encouragement, etc) was sold to me as actual spoons of rice. It started with the breaking-up motions of the spoon in the cooler to break the rice clumps, which felt like a good thing at the time, never mind the rather distasteful facial expression. Then came the shock as the spoon was “dusted” into my plate, well, some grains fell into my plate for sure. But then I watched the same seller attend to a male customer and it was better than mine.
We have often talked about female privileges but let’s briefly talk about male privileges, shall we?
“My friend and I went to get food at the cafeteria, while the lady was attending to my friend, a guy came around to buy food as well. As soon as she finished attending to my friend, she ignored me and went to the guy, she was just shining her teeth at him. Ah! I had to call her back and remind her that I was there before the guy, rubbish”
Those were the words of a female friend in her lamentations. Before you get tempted to say “oh, she’s female” here’s what a male Brownite had to say on the subject too
“Lol, she does that to me often. Each time I go to buy food, she starts smiling sheepishly and unnecessarily, and the quantity of my food is always better. I guess she wants to get married to a doctor”
On and on, there have been complaints about some of the vendors being rude and borderline dismissive of some female customers while batting eyelashes and dancing to the tunes of the male customers, like a lioness who just found her next meal.
This, is in addition to the drastic reduction in the quantity of food. Indomeen may be for the rich because after all, other cafeterias sell at cheaper rates and you should live within your means, but where do we turn to when we can no longer afford the cheaper rates of those cafeterias.
It’s almost as if we are suffering from a case of “Awoof dey turn belle oo” where we were given a gift with the right hand and it’s being collected back with the left hand, but again, an agreement was made and Brownites would love to see it upheld.